The Heart Wants What the Heart Wants

I was talking with a friend about love. She thinks love is a choice and in a marriage you choose to love your spouse.

I think love is an emotion. A wonderful feeling and connection that you experience towards another person.  Marriage and that commitment is the choice.

I think that people can do things to keep their spouses engaged. To keep eachother in love with eachother on a daily basis. That only works if both parties are willing to give themselves to eachother and put effort into their relationship. A happy marriage or commitment can't be one sided.

You dont choose love. It finds you, sometimes when you weren't looking for it.  You can look over one day and see a person differently. It's not something you choose. It just happens.  Now what you decide to do with that feeling is on you.

"You can change what you do but you can't change what you want."

Foolish Sadness

Foolish Sadness
I'm not enough to fight for. The damage left would be too much.  Our happiness is selfish. There is too much at stake.

I tried to break things off yesterday.  I couldn't let him go. I'm living in a fantasy life. I'm so much happier when I'm in denial.

But I know how this ends.  Devistated and alone. It's karma that will get the best of me. I guess it wasn't meant to be or we would be.

My heart hurts.

Gay marriage: the non issue, issue

I guess I never really cared one way or the other about the whole gay marriage issue.  For people to say they need the governments approval before they feel they are able to love who they love really bothers me.  I am married. I never felt that I needed to have government approval to do so.  I considered myself married when I said my vows to my husband.  We signed the government paperwork later.  It never occurred to me that I wasn't legally married until I signed that paperwork.  I pledged my love and commitment to him and he did the same for me. We were married.

Look at the show Sister Wives.  Legally only one wife is married to the husband but all of those women have made a commitment to him and have kept their vows to him.

Look Glenn and Maggie. The world ended. Zombies have taken over but it doesn't stop them from deciding to get married. There is no legal document to be signed in their world but they still are proposing the idea of marriage.

Now I understand that people want to be able to share the benefits that have earned with their loved ones. Healthcare is off the table because Obama promised free health care for all.  Where I work, in California, same sex domestic couples are able to share all their benefits with their partners. Whereas opposite sex domestic partners are not able to do so unless they are over 62.  Does this sound equal?  No it's not but you doesn't see a huge uprising over it.

In the end I think that if two people, whoever they may be, need to have their relationship validated by the federal government then maybe they need to look inside their relationship and see what they are really looking for.  Please don't get me wrong. I am in complete support of the institute of marriage.  I just wish people would focus on the relationship itself and not the title.

BOOK REVIEWS - Jan 2013

I guess it's not so much of a review but more of a way to track what books I've read.

THE GIRL WHO KICKED THE HORNETS NEST
Finally I finished this book. It's not that I didn't enjoy it.  I just kept finding other things that I would rather read.  I liked the book.  I'm pretty sure there would be more novels if the author hadn't died.  He tied up all the loose ends of the trilogy  but left the ending open enough to write about the characters again.  It's kind of sad that I won't know what becomes of Kalle Blomkvist and Lisbeth.  I give it 3 1/2, maybe 4 stars out of 5.  It was my least favorite of the trilogy.



THE HUNGER GAMES
I loved this book.  Even though it's a teen novel I really enjoyed it.  It only took me a few days to read it mostly because it's an easy read but also because I wanted to read more.  I will definitely be reading the rest of the trilogy.

New Year, New Ideas

Every year, like many people, I make a New Years Resolution.  Most years I actually keep mine.  This year I have several.

1 - Avoid Wal-Mart at all costs.  I really hate that place and I get in a bad mood when I go there so I have decided to limit my trips there.  Sam's club doesn't count. 

2 - Attempt to learn Italian.  I know I probably won't ever be fluent but I would really like to be able to speak to my sister in laws family.  I would also like to be able to understand it if my niece says something to me in Italian.

3 - Read 12 books.  I don't read as much as I used to so I really need to get back into that habit.  Here is my list.

 - While Europe Slept by Bruce Brawer
 - The Host by Stephanie Meyer
 -  Atlas Shrugged - by Ann Rand
 - Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by JK Rowling
 - One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest by Ken Kesey
 - Room by Emma Donoghue
 - The New Road to Serfdom by Daniel Hannan
 - The Forgotten Man  by Amity Shlaes
 - Demonic by Ann Coulter
 - Screwed by Dick Morris
 - Fifty Shades of Grey by EL James
 - The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini

This list isn't set in stone but I have been wanting to read these books for a while now so I figured this is the year to do it.  If I like the first 50 Shades of Grey book I'll probably read the other two.

Yes, I'm going there.

Abortion.

There, I opened Pandora's box.  I know this is the subject that ruffles so many feathers.  Can a person be in the middle?  I think I am.

Would I ever get an abortion?  No.  Probably not.  I remember being in 7th grade walking home from the bus stop and an 8th grade girl was afraid she she was pregnant and my first response to her was that I would take the baby if she didn't want it.  At 7th grade!  This was long before I ever even thought about having sex.

I'm not saying there aren't reasons for abortion.  I know many women can't handle the ramifications of people pregnant by a guys who raped her.  I also understand that there are many teenage girls who can't handle being pregnant at 16.  But where do you draw the line?

I just don't think it's right to have two consenting adults do not have equal say in the result of the actions.  If a woman becomes pregnant after consentual sex and wants to abort the child, the man has no say in what happens to that child.  However, if man wants to abort that child, and the woman does not, the man is stuck paying child support.  How is that right?  How can that be called a "woman's right to choose"?  Maybe it should be changed to a "woman's right to choose to screw over the guys stupid enough to sleep with her."

I would consider myself Pro Choice as in Pro Choosing to have sex knowing the consequences of my actions.  If a person is raped it's a completely different issue.  If a woman's life is in danger then this is the woman's right o decide whether or not she wants to continue with the pregnancy.  In this day and age child birth is much safer than it was even just 50 years ago.  These days women don't think of childbirth as a potential brush with death.

There are so many facts to consider now a days.  For example IVF.  Tests have shown that fetus's react to a needle prick at a very young gestational age.  Now am I saying that they feel pain?  No, not necessarily, but it is something to be considered.  Where does it stop?  I think for the time being I am comfortable with the position that people choose to have sex knowing the consequence and should have to deal with those consequences in a way that doesn't involve abortion.  Knowing that birth control doesn't work 100% of the time should be enough of a choice.

What's so wrong with Newt?

I like Newt. I know that he isn't the perfect person.  I know about his affairs.  I know that he was under an ethics investigation in the 90's.  I also know he was found innocent of all charges.  I know that he tells things like they are.  Some people call it unpredictable. I call it real.  I just don't get what is so wrong with Newt. 

I think people are missing the big picture.  I have many, many friends who feel that Mitt Romney is the only one who can beat Obama.  They don't like Romney but they like Obama less.  That is a terrible way to think.  Romney is the loser from the 2008.  Why would we want the loser to represent us?  I'm really starting to feel that it's a matter of money not an election of who has the best ideas or vision for the future.

What can Mitt Romney offer? He is vanilla on all issues. He doesn't seem to have a single strong opinion about anything. What bothers me the very most is that during one of the debates Rick Santorum was bashing Romney on RomneyCare. Do you know how Mitt Romney responded?    It's nothing to get angry about.  WHAT!?  It's nothing to get angry about?  I think it's something to get very angry about.  ObamaCare is something that the people didn't want.  It's more spending that we can't afford and probably one of the biggest issues to Republicans.  We don't want it.  How can the Republican party support a candidate who basically passed the same mandate in his state.  And he still supports it! 

So I started thinking, if Romney is the nominee what is going to happen.  Let's just say that he is elected president.  Do you know what we would be getting?  Another Bush.  Someone who doesn't represent what the Republican party stands for.  Then after 4 years all the liberals will point their fingers and say "Look what happened.  We voted in a Republican and look what happened?  Nothing has changed."   It won't changed and do you know why?  No one really wants Romney as president!  He the great compromise that both parties always talk about.  He is the vanilla ice cream of presidential candidates.  He is the perfect politician.  He tries to say all the right things.  He has the money and the connections.  In the end, after 4, or possibly 8 years, of President Romney the Democrats will talk about how they gave a Republican a chance and the Republicans will say that they really didn't want him but he was the only one who could beat Obama.  WTF!?  Why does it have to be that way?

Personally I feel like Newt Gingrich has some really incredible ideas. It is so refreshing to hear someone speak with such passion about the USA.  He wants to make the country great and he has realistic solutions to achieve those goals.  Although I agree with him on the end goals I don't always agree on the path he would take to get there.  However, I think this out of the box thinking is the same type of attitude that made our country great in the first place. 

Gingrich is witty, educated, and knows more about the history of this country than most people.  He is proud to be an American and I think he has the strength and balance to fix what's wrong with this country.  He will bring government spending down and help get more people off welfare.  He will repeal ObamaCare and find a solution to the illegal immigration problem.  He has a big vision for the country and I think that type of thinking is just what we all need.

Why would a person vote for Obama over Gingrich?
The polls are showing that Obama would beat Gingrich.  But why would a person vote for Obama?  My generation, and those younger than me, want to be taken care of.  They no longer feel like they shouldn't have to be responsible for anything.  I went over all the people I know on some kind of government assistance.  Out of all the people I know only one couple did anything to better themselves and get off the assistance.  The other ones are only working part time or end up having more children.  I think that right there shows that our entitlement program is broken. 

More people are on food stamps now and what happens?  The price of food goes up.  So those who are hard working and trying to get by have to pay more for food. 

The minimum wage goes up and what happened?  All those people on salary are now making less money because they don't get raise but inflation drives the prices of everything else up.

Do you know why we are having a housing crisis?  Loan companies were required to give loans to people who couldn't afford them.  Why would they do that?  Yes, it's a nice thought to help someone get a house but why was the government involved?  Why are they involved now?  If you lose your house, then you lose your house and you need to start over.  It sucks but its reality.  There is no government funded program to help you refinance.  Who in the world would think that is a good idea?  These people are adults.  If they have to learn the hard way then so be it.  That is life.

Just a few more points.

Obama is just as much white as he is black and if you are voting for him just because he is black it makes you the racist.

Financial advisor Dave Ramsey hates Obama.  If you listen to his show then you would know this.  If you are on the Dave Ramsey plan then you should be voted against Obama on any of his economic ideas which means you will be voting for the Republican nominee.




That is all.